You Are Yourself

We each have a dominant style, which we use in managing, in volunteering, in family relations, even in relaxing.  A “hyper” person finds running more relaxing than the melodic music enjoyed by a “quiet” person.  Nevertheless, as managers of many different types of people, we need to develop some of the qualities of our opposite style. 

Mental focus is essential in adapting to a new style.  Personally, as someone who feels more comfortable in a well-organized environment, I must consciously reject an inner drive to apply organizational techniques too early in the development of a new idea.  Crisply dividing up work can easily kill the amorphous concepts that can coalesce into an excellent new product or process.  On the other hand, a quiet person may need to come to a meeting with several prepared points in order to have the confidence to speak up during discussions.

Oddly, when I have advised this practice of developing an alternative style, the greatest fear expressed to me is the loss of one’s dominant style.  Perhaps this reflects a fear of losing oneself.  Good news: we can’t lose our dominant style, even if we try. 

The more stress we suffer, the more we will revert to our dominant style as the easiest way to find solutions to problems.  The real problem is that one style never adequately addresses all crises; the real challenge is to discover how to supplement our own style with alternative approaches.  This can be done by practicing, eventually incorporating elements of other styles, or by surrounding ourselves with individuals who work in these other styles.